To Have Loved and Lost
by xPeterPanNeverFailsx
Summary: Toshiro Hitsugaya meets someone who changes his life. Songfic. Toshiro/OC Warning: This is one of my earlier fics, characters may be ooc. Character death. Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of the songs quoted. CURRENTLY BEING REWRITTEN.
1. Moonlight Shadow

**Warning: I am rewriting this story. If the chapter does not have REDONE in bold on the top then be prepared for some mismatching details if you decide to continue.**

_**He passed on worried and warning**_

_**Carried away by a moonlight shadow**_

_**He was caught in the middle of a desperate fight**_

_**And she couldn't find how to push through**_

_**-Groove Coverage**_

"Masaki, Can Ichigo and I go outside and watch the meteor shower, please?" Acuba Hikari asked her best friend's mother and adoptive parent.

"Of course, sweetheart. Just be very careful." She replied.

"I will!" She giggled and ran over to where Ichigo was sitting on the couch watching TV.

"Come on Ichigo! Let's go watch the meteor shower." Acuba begged her best friend incessantly, tugging on his arm playfully.

Ichigo knew it was pointless to argue with her, so he reluctantly agreed. "Alright." Acuba squealed and ran outside looking back expectantly at he adopted brother and friend.

Acuba's parents had been killed in a car accident two years before, when she was five, and her godmother, Masaki Kurosaki, had graciously agreed to take the orphaned child in. Acuba had quickly come to love her new home and adopted family. It was made easier by the fact that her best friend was Ichigo, who she now stood outside waiting for.

Acuba turned her bright mismatched eyes, one blue one purple, up to the sky as soon as Ichigo had come outside and lay on her back in the grass, her raven hair fanning out underneath her. Ichigo followed suit.

Suddenly, Acuba gasped. "Look, Ichigo! Did you see it?" she looked over at her friend to see him smiling brightly.

"Yeah." He laughed, his unspoken fear of the dark temporarily pushed aside. The calm happiness was short lived however.

One moment, Ichigo was laying next to her, the next he was thrown up against the wall of his house. He was knocked unconscious.

"Ichigo!" Acuba jumped up and ran over to her friend.

At the sound of her scream, Masaki opened the door and looked out, horrified. "Acuba, get inside. Quick!" she urged. "I'll get Ichigo."

Before she could comply, though, Acuba was lifted off the ground by something she couldn't see. She was thrown into the air. Acuba screamed.

She heard a loud roar as she came plummeting down toward the ground, as if something was about to devour her….. when the least expected thing happened.

Acuba was snatched out of thin air and placed carefully on the ground. She looked around frantically to try to find out what possibly could have just happened. When her eyes passed over where Ichigo lay on the ground, she noticed, to her relief that he had regained consciousness. He looked over at her, petrified.

Acuba whipped her head around to where she would assume whatever had thrown her was standing when she heard what sounded like a scream coming from a large monster. As she looked, wide eyed, she thought she caught a flash of white hair.

_What on Earth was that?_ _Could that have been… a person?_

She didn't have much time to dwell on it though because her thoughts were interrupted by her name being called from the porch, where Ichigo stood. She glanced in his direction before looking determinedly back at the spot where she had seen the boy.

From where Ichigo stood near his house he could see all the emotions flit across his friend's face. He also saw her mouth move as she whispered words that were quickly lost to the wind.

Acuba turned around and ran back to the house.


	2. The Perfect Mistake

**REDONE**

_**Wake me up, I've been dreaming**_

_**Cause I haven't heard from you in days**_

_**Hazy now, this fog just follows me around**_

_**And it's only you that burns it away**_

_**-Cartel**_

It was three months after the night watching the stars. The white flash that she had seen never left her thoughts. At first, she considered the possibility that it had been a trick of the moonlight, but the more she thought about it, she disproved the theory.

_I saw someone that night, I know I did._

Being incredibly bored one Saturday afternoon she begged Masaki to take her to the bookstore because of her love manga. Masaki agreed, proud of her 'daughter's' growing interest in reading. Ichigo refused to go when asked, deciding to enjoy the television instead.

"You know, Ichigo. You could learn a thing or two from Acuba." Masaki teased.

"What like how to be a nonsocial bookworm?" He taunted. Acuba cuffed him upside the head and ran out the door to leave with Masaki, leaving Ichigo to yell at a closed door.

As Acuba walked to the store with Masaki, the last thing she expected was to catch a glimpse of snow white hair in the crowd.

"Masaki?" she asked urgently. "Do you see the boy with white hair in the crowd?" Acuba didn't believe her eyes.

"Yes, sweetheart." She responded. "Do you know him?"

"I think so…" she trailed off, trying to reconcile the flash she had seen with the boy down the street. "May I go talk to him? I won't stay long?" She begged using her ultimate weapon… the puppy dog face.

"Alright, just don't wander too far." Masaki agreed. Acuba raced off.

Acuba didn't quite realize how fast she was running until she couldn't slow down fast enough to prevent running into the white haired boy.

_Oh no!_

***Toshiro's POV***

Toshiro had been sent to Karakura Town due to the surge of hollows in the area. He was walking down the main street in his gigai when he was suddenly shoved forward. He managed to prevent himself from falling. The same could not be said for whoever had hit him. He heard a loud OOMPH as said person hit the ground.

He turned around…

To be face with a pair of intense sky blue eyes looking apologetically up at him.

"I'm so sorry." She said. "I didn't realize how fast I was going." Toshiro's minor irritation at being shoved dissipated looking at the desperate face below him.

"It's alright." He offered the girl his hand to help her up. He almost dropped her again, though, when he placed where he had seen her before.

_This girl. It can't be…_

He was so deep in thought; he almost missed what she was saying.

"I know this will sound really weird, but… are you the boy who saved me?" She said the last part so fast that he nearly couldn't decipher what she said. When he did, he was even more shocked then when he first recognized her.

"You could see me?" he asked incredulous.

"Well, no. I only saw a flash of your hair, so I assumed it was you because, well, it's not exactly a common color." She stuttered in embarrassment. Then she registered his question.

"Wait, you asked if I could see you." she exclaimed. "It was you!" she smiled widely.

By now, Toshiro had recovered and offered her a curt nod in response.

"Thank you!" she exclaimed and threw her arms around him in a quick embrace. Once again, Toshiro was surprised and did not respond. Acuba pulled back quickly, blushing.

"Sorry." She apologized again. He only nodded again.

Acuba opened her mouth to say something else, but was interrupted by Masaki calling her name. Acuba glanced over at her, then looked back at Toshiro.

"I guess I'd better go." She said. She turned to leave.

"Wait." He said. "What is your name?" he asked.

"Acuba Hikari." She responded. "What's yours?"

"Toshiro Hitsugaya." He said.

"Nice to meet you, Shiro." She teased. Toshiro didn't even have time to register his nickname before she ran off.

As he watched her leave he could only think:

_Acuba Hikari, you are one strange girl._

***Acuba's POV***

Acuba was ecstatic.

_I found him! I really found him!_

She ran back to Masaki to continue her trip to the bookstore. Her mind never wavered from constant thoughts of the white haired boy, _Toshiro_.

"So, who's your friend?" Masaki asked.

"His name is Toshiro." She responded, refusing to give more information than that. Masaki didn't push for more. Masaki saw the delighted smile on Acuba's face and decided that she would support a relationship with the boy with the strange hair if he made her daughter this happy.


	3. Unusual You

**REDONE**

**Warning: there are about to be a bunch of time skips, so pay attention to the Author's Notes and Information Updates for any changes.**

**Info Update: Acuba is nine.**

_**Nothing about you is typical**_

_**Nothing about you is predictable**_

_**You've got me all twisted and confused**_

_**It's all new**_

_**-Britney Spears**_

***Toshiro's POV***

It was the strangest thing, but Toshiro hadn't been able to get the strange, outgoing blue- eyed girl out of his head. She seemed so unpredictable, it baffled him. He attributed it to the fact that she reminded him of Momo in all of her bouncy happiness and willingness to make friends easily. He refused to even think that it may be that he liked the girl, no matter how much he didn't know about her.

That was probably why, two years later, he found himself drawn to her house, determined to find a friend in this bizarre mortal who could see flashes of shinigami and hollows.

He was in for a surprise when he arrived.

***Acuba's POV***

Acuba hadn't seen nor heard from Toshiro since the day she ran into him two years ago. She wasn't surprised though. He didn't seem like the kind of person who made friends easily, or wanted too many friends for that matter.

Acuba sighed and fell backwards onto her bed as she thought about the white-haired boy, like she had every day since she last saw him.

_I wonder if he'll ever come back._ She sighed. _I won't be able to keep my promise if he doesn't._

Acuba stood up and went over to her window. She had secretly been practicing her ability to see into the spirit world, unbeknownst to her parents, Ichigo, or any of her other friends. At first the practice only gave her a headache and blurry vision, but by practicing every day, she had managed to perfect her vision and now saw the spirits around her regularly.

Currently, however, she saw nothing outside and went back to lie on her bed and read her manga.

***Toshiro's POV***

Toshiro hesitated at the door before hesitantly knocking on it. The door was opened and Toshiro caught a glimpse of a tall, dark-haired man… before he was forced to dodge a well aimed kick to his face.

Toshiro stepped out of the way to avoid the offending appendage and caught the leg, throwing the man onto the floor to prevent any other attacks. Isshin glared up at the young captain.

"Why are you here?" he asked, both accusingly and somewhat confused.

Toshiro balked at the man on the floor and immediately held out his hand to help him up.

"My apologies, Captain Kurosaki." He bowed.

Isshin laughed and slapped Toshiro on the shoulder. "It's fine!" he boomed "I was just playing with you." his smile lessened and he asked more seriously, "But what reason do you have for being here? I'm no longer a Captain of the Gotei 13."

"I was led to believe that Acuba Hikari lived here. Am I wrong?" Toshiro asked.

At the mention of Acuba's name, Isshin's expression darkened. "What do you want with my daughter Captain Hitsugaya?" he said, sticking to formalities.

Toshiro stood his ground. "I was… intrigued by Acuba when she ran into me one day in the street. I merely wanted to… get to know her… seeing as she sought me out in the crowd that day." Toshiro knew he was treading on a thin line, so he tried to phrase his words as best he could. What he said seemed to by reasonable though, because Isshin's glare subsided.

"Very well. I will let you befriend my daughter if that is _her_ wish." He said sternly, and then added, "But if you hurt her in anyway, if she says one negative thing about you, I will hunt you down."

Toshiro met his stare. "Yes sir."

***Acuba's POV***

With all the commotion downstairs, Acuba could hardly focus on her manga.

_And I was just getting to the good part too._ She sighed, put in a bookmark and went downstairs to yell at whoever was making all the noise. She stopped short when she saw the snow white hair of the boy she hadn't seen in years.

"Shiro?" she asked quietly. He turned around to see her standing and couldn't help it, he smiled at her, breaking his usually stoic expression. "What are you doing here?" she asked confused.

Toshiro sighed inwardly. _Why must everyone keep asking that?_

"I would like to know you better." Was all he said. Acuba smiled.

She looked outside and saw that it was getting dark outside. "Would you like to watch the stars with me then?" she offered, looking to Isshin for approval. He nodded.

"Alright." He agreed. Acuba ran outside happily.

As Toshiro was preparing to follow her, Isshin grabbed his arm. "Watch out for her." He said, and walked away.

**AN: That is all that will be seen of Isshin. **


	4. Damaged

**AN: This chapter starts off in Megumi's POV, and ends in Toshiro's. It's both of their reactions to Ichigo's (and Megumi's) mother's death.**

**Information Update: Megumi is eleven. Still wears athletic shorts and t-shirts (and the baseball cap, of course).**

_**Do, do you got a first aid kit handy?**_

_**Do, do you know how to patch up a wound? Tell me,**_

_**Are you, are you patient, understanding?**_

'_**Cause I might need some time to clear the hole in my heart.**_

_**-Danity Kane**_

I was the one who answered the door when you brought Ichigo home sobbing. Ichigo immediately ran into my arms. He wasn't coherent enough to explain to me what had happened. So, I looked to you. Despite my age, I could still comprehend the sorrow and regret in your eyes. Then it hit me…you had walked my little brother home…my mother was nowhere in sight.

"Where's my mother?" I asked, fear evident in my voice.

You just looked at me and shook your head, never breaking eye contact. I understood the message hidden in that simple action.

"Why?" I whispered. My voice broke.

"I'm sorry." You whispered back. Your gaze finally dropped. "I was too late."

I started to cry now, too.

You tried to explain yourself. "I tried, Megumi. I'm so-"

I cut you off. I could tell you were truly sorry. That you never wanted to let me down. That I had become something important to you. But I didn't care.

"Stop." I whispered, but it was enough to get your attention. "Get out. Leave me alone. I never want to see you again."

"Megumi…"

"GET OUT!" I yelled. I blamed you. You were too late to save her. I wanted you gone.

You left.

***Toshiro's POV***

I had been on my way to visit you, like I usually do when I come to Karakura Town. You had made me promise that whenever I came to town, I would let you know immediately. I did my best to keep that promise.

Then I heard the screaming. Well, crying and screaming. My senses kicked into gear about as soon as the hollow tracker I always carry went off. I ran towards the screaming…

…and stopped short at what I saw. The source of the screaming, a woman I now saw, had been brutally cut off. The hollow hovered over her, devouring her. A little, orange haired boy stood off to the side, crying. I ran at the hollow, but as soon as it saw me, it took off. The woman, however, was clearly dead.

I walked back towards the boy. He was still in shock from the horror he had just seen.

"What is your name?" I asked. I could at least get him home t his family.

"I- Ichigo Kurosaki." He stuttered.

_Kurosaki? Oh, crap._

"I'm going to take you home, Ichigo." I stated.

"O-okay."

We were about halfway back to the Kurosaki home when he broke down, crying hysterically. But he kept walking, refusing to take any help I could offer.

It was you who answered the door when I rang the bell. I figured that was a better idea than sneaking through the window like usual. The boy, Ichigo, ran into your arms as soon as he saw you. I could tell that you and your brother had a strong bond by the way you held and consoled him.

Ichigo couldn't talk because of his sobbing, so you looked at me for answers. I just looked at you sadly. I could see the understanding hit you as you realized what was wrong.

"Where's my mother?" you asked me. I could see that you were terrified of the answer.

All I could do was shake my head. I made sure to keep eye contact. I knew the second I dropped my gaze you would never forgive me. But, then again, you might never forgive me anyway.

"Why?" you whispered. Your voice broke. There was sadness and pain in your eyes.

"I'm sorry." I tried to sound strong, but my voice came out as a whisper anyway. "I was too late." My gaze finally dropped.

You started to cry. I couldn't stand that. I care too much.

"I tried, Megumi. I'm so-"

You cut me off. I was so sorry, but I knew it wasn't enough to get you to forgive me. I never wanted to let you down. You had become my best friend, and I didn't want to lose you. But I saw the hardness in your eyes, and I knew your decision before you even said a word.

"Stop." You whispered. But I heard the power I those words, so I was quiet. "Get out. Leave me alone. I never want to see you again."

Those words hurt more than you would ever know. I made one least attempt. "Megumi…"

"GET OUT!" you yelled. I flinched, but I don't think you noticed. You blamed me. I had been too late to save her. You wanted me gone.

I left.

**AN: For the record, I'm making Toshiro about two years older than Megumi. So, he is about thirteen in this chapter.**


	5. Never Have I Ever

**AN: Hopefully this is the last major time skip. Sorry if they were getting confusing.**

**Info. Update: Megumi is now sixteen. Wears either the school uniform or jean shorts and a tank top (when not at school). Still wears the cap.**

_**Never have I ever felt like this before**_

_**I've never been the one to knock, but now I'm at your door**_

_**Listen very closely, you can hear the sound**_

_**Of a love that makes my heart beat, and my head spin round**_

_**-Hot Chelle Rae**_

The moment Megumi had seen Toshiro leave, she had regretted her decision. She had just chased away the best friend she had ever had, the only friend she had ever had. And she didn't have the courage to call him back. It had been five years since then.

Eventually, she had just stopped thinking about it, focusing instead on her school work, climbing to the top of her class, and helping her father with the business. She had also started taking self-defense classes with her brother, so that nothing like what had happened that night could hurt her family again.

Although she as trying so hard to distract herself with other things, every once and a while she would believe that she saw a flash of white hair in the crowd. She would search for the boy she had once called her best friend, only to find it was an older man or woman outside their house or out shopping.

_Forget it. What makes you think he would ever come back here? You told him you never wanted to see him again. He probably hates you by now._

Now, whenever she saw a flash of white, she would brush it off, not even bothering to scan for him. But some days, she wished that maybe, just maybe, he was actually there, watching hr through the crowd.

***With Toshiro***

He still kept his promise. Every time he would come to Karakura Town he would stop by her house first. He would look at her longingly through the window and wish that the outcome of that night had been different. But he could not change the past.

Sometimes, as he was wandering through town, while waiting for his hollow tracker to go off, he would see her through the crowd, coming home from school. For the first few years after the... _incident_, she would look for him if she spotted his hair, and he would duck into a shop to avoid her gaze. Eventually, though, she just stopped looking, and he watched as she walked past him without so much as a glance his way.

***Normal POV***

One day everything changed. (AN: yes I know that's very cliché) Megumi was walking home from school. She could tell it was about to rain, so she was digging through her bag for an umbrella, not looking where she was going.

Toshiro had been on his phone, scanning for hollows, when….

SMACK

Toshiro managed to regain his balance, whereas Megumi landed on her butt on the ground, her books spilling from her hands.

Toshiro looked down with a harsh glare, ready to reprimand whoever had bumped into him, while Megumi looked up with wide eyes, about to apologize. When their eyes met, they both froze. Toshiro's eyes widened in shock, and Megumi just stared. Megumi was the first to recover.

"Toshiro…" she trailed off. He voice managed to snap the frozen boy out of his thoughts, anger turning to surprise and then terror. He quickly turned on his heel, ready to bolt, when he felt a hand on his wrist. He turned slowly back to face Megumi, to see her on her knees, arm outstretched.

"Toshiro" she said, stronger this time, "Don't go." He nodded slowly, then bent down to help her pick up her books.

They walked back to her house in silence, both too caught up in their thoughts to speak. When they arrived at their destination, Megumi was the first to break the silence, letting out a string of nearly incoherent babble.

"Ohmygosh, Toshiro, I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I never wanted you to leave. I was just mad and my brother was crying and I couldn't think. Please forgive me. I don't blame you, it wasn't your fault. Please don't leave again. Please, I just want you to be my friend again…" Here she had to pause for a breath… only to lose it again when Toshiro pulled her into a hug.

"Of course I'll be your friend again. I never stopped caring for you." He whispered into her hair. "I promise, I will do everything I can to keep you from ever getting hurt again."

Megumi was crying now. "Thank you." She pulled back and grinned. "Now come on in. I think it's time I finally introduce my best friend to my father." She giggled.

Toshiro sweatdropped as she pulled him into her house by his hand.


	6. Raindrops

**AN: This story will be made up of two major parts. This chapter is the conclusion of the first part.**

**Info Update: Three months later.**

_**See it burning in my eyes**_

_**Don't want words, don't want more lies**_

_**They say more than what is spoken**_

_**Promises always get broken**_

_**-Stunt**_

Toshiro was walking the now thirteen- year- old Ichigo home. He and Matsumoto had agreed to switch off guarding the two young Kurosaki teens. He did not want to raise suspicion in Matsumoto by insisting that he always watch Megumi.

Tonight was his turn to watch Ichigo.

_*Flashback*_

_Toshiro had never told anyone in Soul Society about his friendship with Megumi Kurosaki. So, it would be an understatement to say that he was surprised when he was assigned his newest mission from the head Captain._

_ "There has been an increase in the number of hollows in Karakura Town." Captain Yamamoto said. "The cause seems to be a young girl by the name of Megumi Kurosaki. Due to her recent spike in spiritual pressure, more hollows have been appearing and seem to be targeting her."_

_At this, Toshiro's eyebrows rose, not only in fear for his friend, but in surprise. It was rare that a hollow, or hollows, would target one person specifically._

_Captain Yamamoto continued, "Captain Hitsugaya, you and your lieutenant are to go to Karakura Town and protect this girl until I deem it safe for you to return."_

_With a quick agreement, Toshiro was off to collect his things and go to protect his best friend._

_*End Flashback*___

__They had been there for two weeks now. They had fought off many small hollows, but there had not been any worth calling a threat.

Toshiro always managed to maintain a safe distance and whomever he was guarding, and told Matsumoto to do the same. He did not want to scare the Kurosakis by telling them that they were targets. He had not even told Megumi that he was in town yet. He was sure he would catch hell about that later when she found out, like he was sure she would.

Toshiro noticed that Ichigo had arrived home safely, and took his usual post on the roof, waiting for Matsumoto to return with Megumi.

***With Matsumoto and Megumi***

Everything had been going smoothly, so far. It was around eight o'clock at night, and Megumi was walking home from her usual hour long fencing class which followed her hour long archery practice. She had her bow slung over her shoulder, along with her arrows.

Matsumoto stood on one of the telephone poles watching her charge. She had suspected that Toshiro had something going on with the girl she was watching, but she did not want to bring it up until she was sure. She needed this mission to go smoothly.

She was so caught up in her plotting to figure out her Captain's relationship with Megumi Kurosaki that she did not see the hollow materializing until she heard Megumi scream.

Matsumoto snapped to attention. The hollow was larger than most, around twenty feet tall, with eight ten- foot tentacles protruding from its back.

She saw that Megumi had brought her bow down from her shoulder and was attempting to shoot the hollow. Most of the arrows were glancing off the hollow's thick skin, though.

Matsumoto jumped down from the telephone pole so she could help Megumi…

…only to have one of the tentacles wrap around her waist, pinning her arms to her side. She was useless.

"Megumi, run!" she yelled at the young girl.

Startled, Megumi looked up. She didn't know who the woman above her as, but as soon as she saw the shinigami outfit, she knew it would be a good idea to listen to her. She turned to run, but one of the hollow's tentacles wrapped around her ankle.

She was lifted up in the air. She screamed. In her mind, the only thing she could think about was the last time she saw a hollow, the one that had tried to eat her when she was five.

_Too bad Toshiro is not around to save me this time._

She started to cry.

***With Toshiro***

A scream cut through the silence hovering through the town. At the same time, his hollow tracker stared beeping. He looked down.

_Megumi!_

He ran.

***With Megumi***

Toshiro saw Matsumoto immobilized by one of the hollow's tentacles. He drew his sword and cut her free. She dropped to the ground and drew her sword as well.

"Matsumoto, where is Megumi?" he asked sternly.

"The hollow has her by the ankle." She said frantically.

At this point the hollow had turned toward the two that dared to attack him, Megumi dangling from his grip. She spotted him almost immediately.

"Toshiro! Help, please!" she cried.

"Megumi, hold on!" He sprang forward, intent on saving Megumi.

Matsumoto stood back, slightly shocked. She was too focused on the dire situation in front of her to care about the fact that her suspicions about Megumi and her Captain had just been confirmed.

Captain Hitsugaya went to cut Megumi free. Matsumoto was engaged with three others at this point. The hollow swiped at him with one of its free tentacles, though, so Toshiro missed, cutting it off instead.

Enraged, the hollow threw Megumi so that it could attack Captain Hitsugaya with its remaining appendages. Megumi hit one of the nearby buildings with a sickening thud and slid to the ground.

"No!" Toshiro yelled. Furious, Toshiro managed to kill the hollow with one well aimed strike to its mask. The hollow disintegrated.

He ran over to where his friend lay on the ground, and choked at what he saw. Megumi had hit the wall so hard that it had broken both her left arm and leg where they had impacted on the wall. Her blood was pooling around her body from a gash on her right thigh. He knew without looking that the wound was fatal.

He bent down over her and gathered her in his arms. "Megumi…" he whispered.

A small gurgled laugh emanated from her body. He pulled back far enough to see her looking at him.

"You broke your promise." She laughed again. "You didn't come to see me as soon as you got here."

"Megumi, I- " He started. She cut him off.

"It's okay." She said. "I forgive you." And he could see she did. Her happiness to see him in her final moments burned in her eyes like the sun. She smiled up at him. At this point, she was gasping for every breath she took.

"I love you, Toshiro. You will always be my best friend." She managed. She let out her final breath.

Toshiro set her down, and quietly left, unable to look at the girl he had failed to protect.

_That's not the only promise I broke._

He left for Soul Society, leaving his lieutenant behind.

***With Matsumoto***

She had been shocked at her Captain's show of emotion. She had never known him to care so deeply for anyone. But she was even more surprised that he had left.

_He must have forgotten that we still have to send her to Soul Society._

She did not have to wait long. Soon, the girl's spirit appeared.

"Excuse me?" she called to Matsumoto. "You helped Toshiro. Where did he go?"

"He had to leave." She replied softly. "But I can send you to where he went."

Megumi nodded. "Thank you for trying to save me." She smiled. "Tell Toshiro I'll see him soon."

Matsumoto laughed. "I will." She agreed, and stamped her with her sword, sending her off to Soul Society.

**AN: I realize that my chapters are really short, and I apologize. I am trying to make them longer, but no promises.**


	7. IMPORTANT

**IMPORTANT—READ BEFORE CONTINUING**

**Character Description- Update**

**Name: **Acuba Hikari

**Age: **18

**Sword Release: **Bite, Orochi! Manifests as a giant snake that can transform into a spear or a normal sword if need be.

In human form Orochi manifests as a woman with long black hair (in a braid), green snake eyes- wearing what looks like a bright green snakeskin tube top and pants, black heels and a black scarf around her mouth and neck.

**Appearance: **Keeps her hair in a long ponytail that falls to her waist. She now wears a black piece of cloth tied around her eyes (if you've played Kingdom Hearts, it's like Riku) Wears the standard shinigami attire, but she ripped off the sleeves. (like Zaraki's haori)

***There was not enough new info to make an actual chapter (that, and I'm lazy)- so here is what you need to know for the remainder of the story: ***

When Megumi first arrived in Soul Society, she had no memories, so she chose to go by Acuba Hikari. She regained most of her memories during her time in the academy, but chose to stick with her new name anyway.

She does not remember her death.

She graduated the Academy after two years. She has the ability of a Captain, but was placed in the eleventh division due to lack of said positions.

She wears the tie around her eyes because she does not believe that sight is needed to be a good fighter.

After attending the Academy for two years, Acuba was assigned to the 11th squad as fourth seat.


	8. Ignorance

**Info Update: Time to jump into the actual Bleach plot line. This starts right before the ryoka invasion.**

_**You treat me just like another stranger**_

_**Well, it's nice to meet you sir**_

_**I guess I'll go**_

_**I'd best be on my way out**_

_**-Paramore**_

"Congratulations, Miss Hikari." stated Head- Captain Yamamoto. "You have graduated with top marks from the academy. We are proud to add you to our ranks."

"Thank you, Captain." Acuba Hikari stated with a small bow.

"You will be placed in the Eleventh Division, as fourth seat." Captain Yamamoto continued. "However, due to your high marks and abilities, higher than some of our Captains, you will be high on the list for promotion, once any positions open up."

Acuba nodded. "Thank you, Captain" she said again and bowed.

"You must report for duty within the next hour. You are dismissed." Captain Yamamoto said.

Acuba nodded again and left the First Division.

***Outside***

As soon as she was dismissed, Acuba began running to the Eleventh Division. She made it through the first nine divisions without any problems, making sure to memorize the reiatsu of the captains and their lieutenants. In the Tenth Division things were going smoothly. She was still going to make it to her division with time to spare. However, as she rounded a corner…

OOMPH

Papers went flying, and Acuba went stumbling backwards, while the person she hit stood unaffected. Besides his extreme irritation.

He growled and pinched his nose between his thumb and finger. "Watch where you are going, officer." He said angrily.

_That voice…Toshiro._

"Forgive me, Captain. It was an accident." She stated. She then knelt down and began picking up the papers that she had knocked from his hands.

It was then that Captain Hitsugaya noticed the black band around her eyes.

"Forgive my bluntness, but… are you blind?" he asked.

"No, sir, I am not." She said with a slight smile. "I just choose to wear the tie around my eyes because I do not believe that vision is not needed to be a good fighter, that I am just as good a Soul Reaper without it." She explained.

"That's impressive." He stated. "Are you assigned to the Ninth Division?"

"No, Captain."

"Then I must ask… what is your name, seat and division?"

Acuba hesitated for a moment, tempted to say her real name. "Acuba Hikari," she said after a moment, "fourth seat of the Eleventh Division."

She couldn't see him, but she knew him well enough to know his eyebrow rose at her statement.

"Congratulations, Miss Hikari. I wish you well in your new division." He said.

"Thank you, Captain Hitsugaya. But, please, call me Acuba."

"Very well, Acuba." He complied. "I will see you around, then."

"Perhaps we could spar sometime."

She could sense the smallest smile was appearing on his face. "I'd like that." He said. "Goodbye for now, Acuba."

Captain Hitsugaya looked after Acuba as she left.

_There was something about that girl that was just… so… familiar. _

***In the Eleventh Division* **

Acuba arrived at the sparring dojo where she was supposed to meet her captain with only five minutes to spare. She had been happy to run into her friend, but he had nearly made her late. And Acuba hated to be late, especially when it was important.

_He didn't recognize me. Oh well, I suppose it is better that he remain ignorant of my arrival here for now. Who knows what it would do to him? I'll tell him when the time is right._

She walked through the door to the dojo…

…only to immediately be attacked. Using her quick reflexes, she managed to catch the oncoming sword between her two hands, earning a startled gasp from her assailant.

The next thing she heard was a booming laugh from the corner of the room.

"You must be Acuba Hikari, my new fourth seat. Congratulations, we did not expect you to be able to counter that." He laughed again.

Acuba sensed his reiatsu and quickly bowed. "Captain Zaraki, it is nice to meet you." She said.

He snorted. "No need for such formalities here, Acuba." She straitened. "It is custom for any new seated officer to undergo our initiation." He continued. "You must spar with one of the officers seated above you. Since you are fourth seat, you will be sparring against the third seat, Ikakku Madarame. How well you do will determine you duties for the first six months of your service here."

"Now" he yelled "spar!"

Acuba immediately sprang into action, quickly dodging a well aimed strike towards her shoulder. She drew her sword. "Bite, Orochi!"

Her sword sprang to life, transforming into a double ended sword. She threw herself at Ikakku, slashing at vital points on his body, shoulders, feet, and knees. She managed to land two good strikes, one to his left shoulder, cutting deep and rendering that arm useless, and a long but shallow cut to his right thigh.

Due to her constant slashing, she had forced Ikakku into a strict defensive position. But now, she fell back, trying to trick him into the offensive. It worked. Ikakku went after her as soon as he sensed a hole in her defense, striking at her legs, attempting to incapacitate her.

Acuba struck. As soon as he went for the purposefully left opening, Orochi transformed into a spear, much like Ikakku's own. She twisted the shaft of her spear near where Ikakku was holding his, forcing him to drop his weapon.

Acuba placed a well aimed kick to Ikakku's chest, forcing him to fly back and hit the wall. She walked up to him and pressed a foot to his balls, with enough pressure that if he moved it would cause serious pain, and placed Orochi, now in the form of a normal sword, against his throat.

"Check mate, _third seat_." She smirked as she stressed his seat so as to humiliate him further. Ikakku groaned, whether from pain or embarrassment, she was not sure.

"I can't believe I was beaten by a seat _lower_ than mine." He growled. "Not to mention a _girl_."

Acuba growled in anger. She pressed her foot harder and Ikakku yelped from the sudden and constant pain.

"Excuse me? I don't think I heard you right there, Ikakku. Could you say that again please?" she said in an overly sweet voice.

"I-I said congratulations, Acuba. You will do well in this division."

"That's what I thought." She said, pulling her foot back and sheathing her sword. She started when another loud, booming laugh came from the corner.

Captain Zaraki began clapping. "Welcome to the Eleventh Division, Acuba Hikari."

**AN: Sorry it took longer than normal. I've been out of town with no internet. **


	9. Keeping the Innocent

_**Uplift, throw fists in the air**_

_**Let's stir things up while they**_

_**Are carelessly filing themselves**_

_**Into futile lines**_

_**-Belle Epoque**_

According to the announcements, there were four ryoka. Plus whatever motley help they could find in Soul Society. It wasn't until she heard a description of the original four and heard of their mission that she even became remotely interested.

She had befriended Ikakku and Yumichika quickly after joining the Eleventh Squad. So, when Ikakku came back after having his butt kicked soon after the initial announcement, she had gotten all the information she needed from him.

As soon as she heard who had beaten him, she had taken off running, knowing exactly where he would be heading.

Acuba raced to the tower where Rukia was being held.

_An_ _orange haired stranger coming to rescue his friend….Ichigo, you idiot._

She ran in onto the scene just as Gin readied himself to fight Ichigo. Everyone froze when she appeared and turned to face her.

"Well, well. What are you doing here little bluebird?" Gin asked, using the pet name he had given her upon first sight of her hair. She found it demeaning, but enjoyed it nonetheless.

"Forgive me for intruding on your fight, Captain." She apologized. "I just had to meet this mysterious, flame-haired ryoka who risked his life to save his friend, and managed to defeat the third seat in my squad, not to mention my Captain, in the process."

Said ryoka, however, was standing off to the side, gaping at the new arrival.

_*Flashback*_

_ Thirteen- year- old Ichigo opened the door to the worst shock he had had since his mother had been killed. There, in the arms of an unknown woman, was his sister, covered in blood and obviously dead._

_ "M-megumi?" he sobbed._

_ Matsumoto couldn't stand the sight of the crying in front of her. However, she did not know hoe to comfort him. "I'm sorry." She said._

_ "What happened?" he asked, tears running down his face._

_ "A monster attacked her. We were unable to save her. I'm sorry." She said again._

_ "Like the one that killed my mom?"_

_ "Yes. It was a different monster, but it's the same idea." Ichigo held out his arms to take his sister. Matsumoto handed her to him._

_ "Thank you for bringing her home." He said sadly. He closed the door without another word._

_ "I promise, if I find her I will do everything I can to take care of her for you." Matsumoto whispered to the closed door._

_*End Flashback*_

"M-megumi?" he asked, still in shock. He would recognize his sister's hair anywhere. He just never believed that he would see it again after the 'accident', as he called it.

Her head snapped towards Ichigo. "I do not know who 'Megumi' is," she lied, "but I am not her." She turned back to Captain Ichimaru. "If you don't mind, Captain, I would like to test my skills against this boy, seeing as he incapacitated my Captain."

"Of course, little bluebird. Go ahead." He stepped out of the way.

She turned back toward Ichigo, who had now moved into a fighting stance. "Ichigo Kurosaki," she said as she drew her sword. He started at his name. "My name is Acuba Hikari, Fourth seat of the 11th squad. Fight well or I will kill you." She gave no more warning, and immediately attacked.

"Bite, Orochi!" she yelled and threw her sword at her opponent. Her sword transformed into a giant snake preparing to strike. It struck at him multiple times, Ichigo managing to block her nearly every time, receiving a few deep bites in the process.

Finally, Orochi managed to break Ichigo's sword from his grasp by catching it right after he attempted to counter. And as she prepared to finish the fight with one last strike…

…Her sword was blocked by hundreds of what looked like sakura blossoms. Acuba whipped around. "Captain Kuchiki." She gasped and withdrew her sword.

"My apologies for interrupting your fight, but I believe this boy came here to fight me." He stated emotionlessly. "Step down."

"Yes, Captain." She complied. She turned her head back to Ichigo one last time. "Good luck, Ichigo." She smiled, teasingly. "If you could barely keep up with me, you'll need to work ten times harder to beat Captain Kuchiki." Then she turned and left.

Ichigo watched her leave with sadness in his eyes. _I know that was Megumi. So, why didn't she say anything to me?_

***With Ichigo***

Byakuya had told him he needed to achieve bankai to be able to beat him. So now, Ichigo was sitting in a cave hiding his eyes from a naked Yoruichi. He wondered how he even managed to get into this situation for a moment, before remembering Rukia. Now he was just trying to make it through this training.

"Oh, Ichigo!" she yelled. "I almost forgot."

"What?" he asked, tired.

"I found someone in Soul Society who would be willing to help you with your training. I actually think she will do a better job than I will." She said

"Well, who is it?" he asked irritated.

_Great. Another person to work my ass off._

"Me." Said a voice behind him. Ichigo whirled to see who the familiar voice belonged to.

"Megumi?" he said, surprised.

"Hello, little brother." She said, smirking.

"B-but, how-?"

She cut him off. "I apologize for my behavior earlier, Ichigo. No one here knows me as Megumi, so I would ask that you call me Acuba while you are here. Besides, my involvement with you, if revealed, would do damage to both of us. I was trying to protect you. Please forgive me if I hurt you."

Ichigo stared at his sister for a moment. Then he ran up and hugged her small form. "Of course I forgive you. You are my sister."

"I'm glad." She said. She backed up. "Now, it's time to begin your bankai training." She announced with a smirk.

Ichigo gulped.

***At the Senkai Gates*** (Ichigo is leaving)

Acuba stood in the crowd as her little brother received his substitute shinigami band that officially allowed him into their ranks, or at least, welcomed him among them. She smiled as Captain Yamamoto welcomed him into the ranks and knew Ichigo was smiling too.

Ichigo searched the crowd looking for his sister whom he knew was lurking somewhere amongst the group of people come to see the infamous ryoka who broke into Soul Society to attempt save his friend.

_ There_. He spotted her bright blue hair. She was standing behind the squad six lieutenant, Renji. He smiled as he saw her.

Acuba sensed Ichigo looking at her and smiled. She nodded her head in approval of his recognition and hoped he would get the message. _I'm proud of you Ichigo._

Ichigo understood. He turned towards the Senkai Gate and, with a generic wave backwards, left for Karakura Town. _I'm glad you're alive, Megumi. I'll miss you._


	10. 30 Minutes

**I am currently in the process of rewriting this story. So, sorry if some of the details don't line up.**

_**Can we fly? Do I stay? **_

_**We could lose, we could fail**_

_**In the moment it takes**_

_**To make plans or mistakes**_

_**-T.A.T.U**_

The hell butterfly landed on Acuba's shoulder around eight in the morning, just as she was about to report for her morning assignment in the Eleventh Division.

"Acuba Hikari, report to Head Captain Yamamoto as soon as possible." Knowing her Captain wouldn't care whether she reported to him first or not, she immediately changed her direction and took off toward the Head- Captain's office.

Upon arrival, she barely had time to knock before a quick "enter" was heard from inside. Acuba did so, closing the door behind her.

"Good morning, Head Captain. What can I do for you?" she asked as she bowed.

"In light of recent events, you have been reassigned." He stated. "Due to your abilities, you are to be assigned to the Ninth Division as the new captain. Do you accept?"

Acuba was stunned. Recovering, she thought through his question quickly and answered before he got too impatient. "Yes. Thank you, Captain." She bowed again.

At her response, his Lieutenant stepped forward and handed Acuba her new captain's haiori and arm band.

"Very well, I will leave it to you to inform Captain Zaraki. You report in an hour to meet your squad. You are dismissed Captain Hikari." With a slight jolt at the sound of her new title she bowed and left.

***In the Eleventh Division***

Acuba approached where she knew Captain Zaraki would be training with Ikakku that morning. Sensing a sudden burst in Zaraki's spiritual pressure, she stepped to the side… as Ikakku smashed through the door and landed at her feet. He looked up at her.

"Good morning, Acuba." He said groaning as he stood up. "What brings you here? You should be on a mission." He looked at her, confused.

"I've been reassigned. Squad Nine." She answered his unspoken question.

Hearing this, Captain Zaraki came over from his spot on the other side of the room. "And what will your new position be?" he asked skeptical.

"I am the new Captain." She grinned evilly. "I guess that makes us equal now, Captain Zaraki." She said. Her blue eyes sparkled mischievously, irritating him. She turned around and left before he had a chance to respond, and left for the Ninth Division.

As she walked away, she heard Ikakku running after her. "Acuba!" he yelled. "Wait up."

She stopped and he ran into her back. "Are you really leaving the Eleventh Division?" he asked with a sad look.

"Yeah." She laughed. "Don't worry, Ikakku. You can come train with me anytime time you like."

Ikakku smiled and laughed. "Will do." He said and ran back to train.

***In the Ninth Division***

When she arrived to her new office, she was greeted by the sight of Hisagi sitting at his desk doing paperwork. Slipping on her Captain's haiori and arm band, she fully entered the room, causing Hisagi to look up.

"My name is Acuba Hikari. I will be you new Captain." She offered with a slight smile. He did not return it.

"Welcome to the Ninth Division." He replied sadly.

_He regrets Tozen's choice. I guess it will take a while to earn my place here. _She thought_._

***A Few Days Later***

Captain Hikari was training with Hisagi when she heard the announcement. "All Captains and Vice Captains are to report to the Senkaimon for immediate departure to the human world." She looked over at her Vice Captain.

"This is it, Hisagi." She said breathlessly. "It's time to take down Aizen, once and for all." Hisagi nodded and the two flash- stepped to the Senkaimon.

Upon arrival, they were told that a false world had replaced the human world for the imminent battle. Captain Hikari moved up to stand beside Captain Hitsugaya. "Are you ready?" she glanced over at the small Captain. His only response was a small nod before the Senkaimon was opened and the group took off.

***In Battle***

Captain Hikari watched as the top three Espada fell at the hands of her fellow Captains. She would assist where she was needed, but for the most part she guarded the flame bubble where Aizen, Gin, and Tozen were trapped.

Unfortunately, her guarding was not enough. The Ex- Captains broke free, thanks to Wonderweiss. Once again she was forced to take a back seat to the battle as she watched the Head Captain battle Wonderweiss.

She nearly cried in dismay as her Vice Captain, Hisagi, came so close to death at the hand of his former Captain.

She snapped to attention when she noticed Captain Soifon, Captain Kyoraku, Captain Ukitake, and Captain Hitsugaya facing off against Aizen. They all attacked… and one by one, they all fell.

She watched as Captain Hitsugaya landed a killing blow… and was just as shocked as he was when Momo appeared in his place a few moments later. She saw the fury on his face and she saw the decision form before he even made a move.

He turned and prepared for a full frontal attack.

_No!_ she screamed in her head, not realizing that she had screamed it aloud as well.

She sprinted forward as fast as her feet would carry her…

Before Captain Hitsugaya could comprehend what was happening, he was shoved out of the way of the oncoming sword.

A loud "No!" was screamed, but he was too surprised at the sudden, forced motion that he could not register whose voice it was.

He heard the sickening sound of a sword slicing through flesh….. right before he blacked out.

**Sorry it took so long. School is eating my time…**


	11. Where Butterflies Never Die

**INFO: I AM REWRITING THIS STORY. PLEASE GO BACK TO CHECK FOR MAJOR CHANGES OR ADDITIONS. (or just ask if you have questions.) No Flames please.**

**AN: I imagine that the song playing in the background for next two chapters is Iridescent by Linkin Park (the lyrics at the beginning of the chapter fit the individual chapters better though)**

_**Restful mind and peaceful eyes**_

_**When sound is gone then you will find**_

_**It's all the same for the dreamers**_

_**It's all the same for us**_

_**-Broken Iris**_

_Before Captain Hitsugaya could comprehend what was happening, he was shoved out of the way of the oncoming sword._

_ A loud "No!" was screamed, but he was too surprised at the sudden, forced motion that he could not register whose voice it was._

_ He heard the sickening sound of a sword slicing through flesh….. right before he blacked out._

Captain Hitsugaya woke up to find himself in a small crater form where he has hit the ground. Disoriented, he checked himself for injuries. Except for a few minor cuts from his impact with the ground, he found none. _But I was attacked. What…_

That's when he noticed the person laying a couple feet from him, panting heavily.

Toshiro looked over at the woman who had just saved his life. Acuba Hikari had a deep gash running from her right shoulder to her left hip. He could tell merely by looking that the wound would kill her. He approached the fallen Captain, wide-eyed in shock.

"Why- why would you do that?" asked Toshiro.

Acuba turned her head to the incredulous Captain, eyes closed in a wince. "Because you are important to me." She responded as she reached her hand up to wipe away the blood that had fallen into eyes from a small but deep cut on her forehead, grimacing as the movement jarred her new wound. "And I made a promise- one that I plan to keep." She gasped.

She opened her eyes and looked directly at the Captain standing above her. Toshiro fell to his knees in grief as he laid eyes upon the beautiful blue color that had first captured his attention and that he had come to love in the past, and still did.

_**Flashback**_

_Seven year old Acuba Hikari gazed at the spot where she had sworn she had just seen a flash of white hair. _

What was that?_ She thought. _It couldn't have been a person… could it?_ She played through the last few moments in her mind. She had been thrown in the air by an invisible force, then mysteriously placed back on the ground without a scratch._

There had to have been someone here who saved me._ There was no other explanation._

"_Acuba!" Ichigo yelled from his porch where he was staring at her in shock and fear. "Are you okay?" he yelled, too scared to move from his spot near his house._

_She smiled brightly at her best friend. "Yeah, Ichigo. I'm fine!" she answered back, scratching the back of her head. "That was freaky, wasn't it?"_

"_Yeah. Let's go inside." He almost pleaded._

"_Coming!" she looked back at the spot where the flash had come from._

"_Whoever you are, whatever you are, I promise I'll repay you for saving my life." She whispered into the wind. She turned and ran inside._

_**End Flashback**_

"Acuba." Toshiro whispered as silent tears began to slide down his face. Gently, he picked her up and cradled her in his arms. "Why?"

"Because I love you. I always have, since that night you saved me, and I always will." She said quietly. She could feel the life leaving her body as all sounds faded- except Toshiro's sobs. "Take care of yourself, Shiro" she whispered as her breathing slowed. "Don't cry for me, please."

_I'm not sad. _She thought. Acuba was disappointed that she had to leave Toshiro right after she had finally fulfilled her unspoken promise, but she wasn't sad to be dying for the reason that she was. She had saved the boy she had owed a life debt to, the boy she had been in love with since she was seven. Her mind could rest easy knowing that Toshiro would live.

Toshiro's mind, however, was spinning. _That's a promise I can't keep, Acuba._ Toshiro looked down at the girl he loved with tears in his eyes. _She looks… peaceful._

"You can't leave me, Acuba. Not now. Not until you know how I feel for you." He choked out.

"Live your life, Toshiro. Live it for me. That's all I ask."

"I can't. Not without you."

"You can. You can fall in love again. You can move on-"

"No. Please. Don't leave me again." He pleaded.

"We all die, Toshiro. I'll see you again someday. I promise. I'll see you in your dreams, Toshiro. I love you."

Her eyes began to fade. Her grip on his haori loosened.

_ No. _He thought. _No, no, no, no, NO! _He looked around frantically for something, anything that could help save the dying girl in his arms. He came up with nothing. He looked back down into her face.

And the soul of Acuba Kurosaki, Ichigo Kurosaki's best friend and Toshiro Hitsugaya's one love, left her body in the arms of the only man she ever loved.

Toshiro saw the light go out in Acuba's eyes. He also noticed that even in death, her eyes remained peaceful.

Toshiro saw the hell butterfly that signaled that she had passed on. It fluttered around his head before coming to rest lightly on his shoulder, as if trying to comfort him. He looked at it with sad eyes.

_"I'll miss you"_ The whisper of her voice was so quiet that Toshiro was almost unsure that he heard it. But as he looked down at her face, so peaceful in death, and felt the light weight of the butterfly on his shoulder, he knew what he had heard was real.

And Toshiro cried.

"I love you, too."

**Author's Note: Cliché, I know. If you prefer sad endings **_**STOP HERE.**_


	12. Moving to Seattle

_**I can smell it on the pavement**_

_**It's about to rain**_

_**And you can feed me all the pills you want**_

_**But it cannot stop the pain**_

_**-The Material**_

"_Take care of yourself, Shiro" she whispered with her dying breath._

_And Toshiro cried._

_ "I love you, too."_

Ichigo had taken over the fight against Aizen, but Toshiro never noticed. Nor did he care. All he could think about was the woman he was holding in his arms. After all this time, she had been right in front of him.

_She can't be gone. She just can't. _

He made no attempt to stop the tears running down his face. He made no attempt to move, to get away from the fight happening so close by. He was numb. He let the pain wash away for an emptiness that he couldn't comprehend, even if he _were_ in his right mind.

_This isn't happening. I looked so long, and she was right in front of me. How could I not notice? How could I be so stupid? And now she's gone- again. And I couldn't do anything to stop it. AGAIN._

He didn't feel it when it began to rain. He didn't feel it when Captain Unohana touched his shoulder. And he didn't feel the exhaustion that should have been washing over his body.

"Captain Hitsugaya," said Captain Unohana quietly, "we are headed back to Soul Society now. Allow me to take her for you."

Toshiro looked up with sorrow filled eyes and nodded slowly. He stood up and began mechanically heading back to the Soul Society.

When they arrived, a Fourth Division medic offered to heal him, he wasn't sure who, but he refused. No amount of healing could take away the pain he now harbored deep within him. Besides, now the scars could serve as a reminder of all the horror he had suffered this day, both physical and mental.

Once safely back in his room, he lay down in bed and the full weight of what happened crashed down on him. All the pain rushed back. And Toshiro Hitsugaya screamed.

***In the Fourth Division***

The moment Captain Retsu Unohana reached the Soul Society, she rushed to the Fourth Division. While carrying the newest Captain of the Soul Society on her back, she had noticed a slight, fluttering heartbeat. It had been faint, but it was still there.

_Captain Hitsugaya must not have noticed, he was so overcome with grief. She must be incredibly important to him…_

She called for her seventh seat, Hanataro Yamada, to come as quickly as possible.

"Y-yes, Capitan?" he stuttered when he arrived.

"Hanataro, Captain Hikari is in very critical condition. You are to be the senior medic on her case. I will have other medics help you when need be, but you are to be in charge. You are not to leave her side unless you need to get something that is required to keep her stable, or unless I allow otherwise. Understood?" she commanded with authority, a serious look on her face.

"Y-yes, of course, Captain." He scurried off to tend to his friend and new patient.

***Five Days Later***

Captain Hitsugaya had refused to leave his room since they had returned to Soul Society, despite the many attempts by Matsumoto and others. Anytime a person would get even close to his door, he would send out a harsh, focused burst of spiritual pressure as a warning. That would normally send them running.

On the fifth day, Matsumoto came by her Captain's room. And, as usual, he sent out the burst or reiatsu. She refused to be deterred, though.

"Captain, you must come back to work. The squad needs you now that the war is over." She called.

No response._ It will take time, but I will help him get through this. The squad needs him back._

She tried again, softer. "Please, Captain. Talk to me. Everyone is worried about you."

She heard rustling behind the door and his voice called out wearily, "I'm sorry, Matsumoto, I can't."

"Why not?" she demanded.

"Maybe my dreams are just better than your reality." He sighed cryptically. Matsumoto did not understand, but she decided that the best thing would be to let him be for now.

"Alright, Captain. I'll leave you alone for now. But I will be coming back." She warned. As she turned to leave, she heard the rustling that indicated that he was moving deeper under his covers and the soft sound of him beginning to cry.

***Two More Days Later***

True to her word, Matsumoto returned. She had managed to get her Captain out of bed and into his office. However, even she could tell that he was not all there. He would do his paperwork mechanically and he wouldn't yell at her when she went off to drink with Kira and Hisagi.

The lack of anger from her Captain had the opposite effect on her than she was expecting, though. She was now more determined to do her work, instead of taking advantage of her captain's leniency. Now, she just wanted to do anything she could to help her Captain.

Matsumoto had learned of Captain Hikari's hospitalization the previous day. However, whenever she tried to mention it, or anything else pertaining to her, he would either start yelling at her or begin sobbing. She was actually more afraid of the latter.

She learned quickly to avoid the topic all together.

_I'll just have to keep an eye on him until she can come snap him out of this._

Other than doing paperwork, Captain Hitsugaya would spend all of his time either in his room or in the garden outside the office, staring into space. She could only guess at what he was thinking.

She knew that her Captain was in an incredibly fragile state. She avoided conversation with him for fear of saying something that would set him off. On occasion, she would even offer to take some of his paperwork because he had frozen and it was the only way she knew to snap him back to reality.

_You will get through this Captain. We need you back._

She just hoped what she could do would be enough.


	13. Coming Home

**I'm coming home, I'm coming home**

**Tell the world I'm coming home**

**Let the rain wash away**

**All the pain of yesterday**

_**-Diddy**_

Acuba heard the voice before she had fully opened her eyes.

"_You shouldn't be here."_

Acuba opened her eyes to see Orochi standing on a stone pedestal across from her. Looking down, Acuba realized that she was standing on one as well and that below it was a large expanse of blue sky, riddled with clouds. She looked up to see the same thing.

"Orochi? Where am I?" Acuba asked.

"_The world between worlds, limbo, the world that never was- you pick."_

"Am I dead?" she asked quietly, slightly afraid of the answer.

"_Not yet."_

"Then why am I here?"

"_You chose to sacrifice yourself for the life of another. It is not your time to die."_

"What's going to happen to me?" she was starting to get aggravated at Orochi's round- about answers.

"_Because of your sacrifice, you will be given a choice. You may choose to continue on the path you have started, and enter a world filled with happiness, devoid of pain, sorrow, and suffering…"_

At this, a white stone pathway leading away from the pedestal Acuba was standing on appeared to her right. Acuba could feel the elation emanating from down the pathway. She automatically began to turn towards it, but forced herself to turn back and listen to the rest of what Orochi was saying.

"…_Or, you may choose to return to the world you came from and live until your destined time to die, facing all the trials originally set for you." _Orochi finished.

A black pathway appeared to her left. It was at this point that Acuba realized that she was in no pain. That she felt light, and while not happy, content.

"_The decision is yours to make, but you must do so quickly. Your time in this world is running out. Soon, the decision will be made for you."_

Acuba looked down both paths and thought hard.

Her first thoughts went to Toshiro and how he would be handling her 'death'. _For all I know he's fine. Or he could be devastated. It did seem as if I was important to him._ However, her thoughts quickly turned toward the shining white path to her right, its beauty overtaking whatever sadness she was feeling.

The sky above and below her clouded over as she thought, her feelings influencing the weather around her. There was a loud clap of thunder, and it began to rain.

"_You should not be so upset. Not many people would get a chance like this. Take it while you can." _Orochi prodded.

"This decision is not one to be taken lightly, Orochi. You must be patient." she said, "For me." She added when she noticed her sword's irritated face at being talked back to." Orochi's face softened.

"_I'm sorry. This is hard for me too. My only goal is to keep you safe. This was never something I planned for."_

Acuba nodded at her sword and went back to her thoughts.

_I leapt into harm's way knowing what the outcome would be. Why not embrace death now as I expected to when I took the sword for Toshiro? _

She had chosen to sacrifice herself for the man she loved. She had never assumed that she would have a choice to go back. Her determination to die for Toshiro lingered from when she had first jumped in front of the sword aimed for him. She began to turn toward the right, to move on from the world she knew-

And stopped…

The look in Toshiro's eyes as she died flashed through her mind. The look of shock, pain and love made her resolve to move on falter. She heard the echo of his words as she stared down the path that could take her home.

_Live your life, Toshiro. Live it for me. That's all I ask._

_ I can't. Not without you._

She remembered the last few words they spoke to each other. He needed her. Who knew what he would do if she left for good. She didn't want to think about it.

_We all die, Toshiro. I'll see you again someday. I promise._

He might make it sooner that she could possibly desire. She couldn't let him do that.

Then, of course, there was Ichigo. Her best friend… how could she have forgotten?

_Promise me we will always stay together. No matter what_.

_Promise! _

She had made that promise to him, and she swore to herself that she would never break her promises.

She turned to Orochi and spoke loud and clearly.

"I choose to go back."

"_Very well." _A rare smile ghosted over Orochi's lips_. "I will see you on the other side."_

Acuba nodded and began walking down the black pathway. Her steps constantly increased in speed until she was in a dead sprint.

_I'm coming back for you, Shiro._


	14. Things I Never Say

**AN: Yay! Final chapter! Sorry it took so long. **

_**If I could say what I wanna say**_

_**I say I wanna blow you away**_

_**Be with you every night**_

_**Am I squeezing you too tight?**_

_**-Avril Lavigne**_

Megumi slowly opened her eyes- and saw the white ceiling of the fourth division. "I'm back" she whispered to no one. "I'm alive." A smile spread itself across her face.

_Toshiro_

At the thought of the small, ice captain, she tried to sit up- only to fall back onto the pillows with a yelp of pain. She looked down at her torso to see it completely wrapped in bandages.

_Crap. I forgot about that._ She sighed, irritated at being unable to move immediately.

At the sound of her yell, seventh seat Hanataro Yamada came rushing through the door.

"Captain Hikari, you're awake" Hanataro gasped in surprise.

"You sound shocked." She retorted, still irritated.

"W-well, you've been on life support with multiple healers attending to you for the last week and a half. I-I'm sorry, but nobody believed that you would live s-survive your injury, never mind wake up." Hanataro managed to stutter.

_I've been unconscious for ten days? And everyone thought I was dying or dead. TOSHIRO._

"Hanataro" she barked with more intensity then she intended, "am I allowed to move around now that I'm awake?" Hanataro flinched at the intensity in her voice.

"W-well, yes but-" he hesitated.

"But what?"

"But you, been in critical condition for the past ten days. It could do serious damage to the healing process if you try to move too much."

"I don't care. I need to." she insisted.

"O-okay. Prepare yourself. Getting up will be the hardest part, so let me help you." Acuba nodded.

"3"

_I'm not dead Toshiro, I'm coming._

"2"

_I'm still here for you._

"1"

_TOSHIRO!_

Acuba yelled as her shy friend helped her out of the bed. It hurt more than she was expecting. Regardless, of the pain though, and regardless of the small trickle of blood seeping into her bandages, she took off running as soon as she could stand.

_I'm coming!_

****With Toshiro****

Captain Hitsugaya couldn't focus on his paperwork, so he stared numbly at the desk in front of him. She was gone, and there was nothing he could do about it.

"_Take care of yourself"_

How could he take care of himself when the only thing that mattered to him for the past ten years had suddenly been torn out of his grasp, permanently?

He was about to head outside, but stopped short and sat back down thinking of the time she had shown up in the garden outside his office.

_**Flashback**_

_ Captain Hitsugaya had just returned from getting his paperwork when he was suddenly interrupted by someone running into him from around a corner. The offending person stuttered an apology, before quickly gathering the papers she had knocked out of his hands._

_ Wishing to return to his office, he asked her a few questions and soon departed. However, he could not shake the image of the blue-eyed girl._

There was something about that girl that was just… so… familiar. _He thought._

_ But he shook it off and threw himself into his paperwork._

_*Later*_

_ Toshiro finished his paperwork and set it down on his desk, happy to be finished. He laid his head down on the desk, only to snap it back up when he felt someone's reiatsu in the small garden outside his office. _

_ He slowly walked out to see the girl from earlier._

_ "Who are you?" he asked, relaxing slightly. _

_ She looked surprised for a moment, which was replaced with an expression of hurt. "You don't remember." It wasn't a question._

_ "No." he answered anyway. "Who are you?" he repeated._

_ "If you do not know, then I will let you figure it out." She responded, mysteriously._

_ Then she was gone._

_**End Flashback**_

He sighed at the memory. He had lain awake all night, and had finally remembered. The girl with the mismatched eyes. His once-friend…

He felt the burst of reiatsu before he heard the pounding footsteps heading toward his office. His train of thought was broken.

_That spiritual pressure, it couldn't be- _

"Toshiro!" she yelled as she burst through the door and skidded to a stop in front of the desk he was currently still staring at. "Toshiro, look up. I'm here. I'm real."

_It can't be. She's gone, and she's never coming back. It's a hallucination. It has to be._

"Shiro. It's me." He could almost hear the tears in her voice.

_**Please look up…I need to see your face.**_

Toshiro raised his head and almost laughed at the scene before him. There she was- standing there in scrubs from the fourth division, hair askew, eyes wide with tears, and breathing labored from running all the way to the tenth division. And she was REAL.

The sound that emitted from his throat was a mix between a sob and a laugh as he rounded his desk to come closer to her. He tentatively reached out a hand to caress her face which soon ended in him pulling her to him and hugging her as tightly as he could.

Acuba gasped from the pain, but said nothing, welcoming his tight embrace.

"It's you" he breathed.

_**I missed you so much.**_

"I'm here." She giggled.

_**I never could have left you.**_

"You're here- and I'm never letting you go again." He stated matter- of- factly, which only caused her to giggle harder.

_**I will protect you, always.**_

"I love you, Shiro." She said and she kissed him with all the love and passion she had built up over the years.

_**Do you promise to be with me forever?**_

He gasped when they broke for air. "And I love you, Megumi."

_**Yes…forever**_

**Authors Note: Yay! Sappy ending! Sorry I'm terrible at writing endings. No Flames, please.**


End file.
